Sunday, May 18, 2014

Children Speaking Their Minds

Dear Diary,

My brother shared this via Whatsapp. It's hilarious!

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America
MARIA: Here it is
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using the tables

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile'?
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing that we have today that we didn't have ten years ago?
WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with I
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie....always say, "I am"
MILLIE: All right..."I am" the ninth letter of the alphabet

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now Louis, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand

TEACHER: Now Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook

TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No sir, it's the same dog

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE